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Recent Posts
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Results tagged “green marketing”
Because We Destroyed The Planet Already, You Should Buy More Oil
They believe the "Earth" could use a tune-up?
And the Earth is all like, "Yo, I believe I should make a volcano erupt under Valvoline's headquarters."
We Saved Water! And Destroyed Everything Else!
In a fancy bathroom, here's a super-cool, brushed steel, ultra-modern automatic flushing urinal panel with a tiny little message on a sticker in the bottom left.
That 3' x 3' heavy steel panel took a lotta carbon and iron, natural resources up the wazoo. But hey you're saving water, so what the hell!
That 3' x 3' heavy steel panel took a lotta carbon and iron, natural resources up the wazoo. But hey you're saving water, so what the hell!
Help Us Save Trees. Don't Buy This.
Green marketing and advertising, like all marketing and advertising, tries to convince you of the impossible. In this case, the company that cuts down trees and uses paper is really saving trees. Here we have Marcal toilet tissue, with the banner "New Name, New Look, Improved Product" so you know it has to be a lie.
Let us deconstruct.
You've got the product name in all lower-case, "small steps" so it seems harmless and cute with a little arrow in the p making you feel like you're practically turning back the clock to a smaller steppier kind of time:
Let us deconstruct.
You've got the product name in all lower-case, "small steps" so it seems harmless and cute with a little arrow in the p making you feel like you're practically turning back the clock to a smaller steppier kind of time:
You've got this "Help Us Save 1 Million Trees" declaration smack in the middle, almost seeming like this is a campaign you can sign up for (there is no campaign, btw)
And again with the saving the trees crap, except, tell me: If they've been in the business of making paper since 1950, how can they be saving trees? Isn't paper, uh, made from trees? Don't they have to cut them down in order to make the paper??
And again with the saving the trees crap, except, tell me: If they've been in the business of making paper since 1950, how can they be saving trees? Isn't paper, uh, made from trees? Don't they have to cut them down in order to make the paper??
Just What The World Needs: Cloroxymoron
Got the wordplay in the headline? I'll explain. Clorox, AKA Branded Chlorine Bleach came out with a new line of products called "Green Works" that's healthy, green, biodegradable, natural, perfect, endorsed by The Sierra Club ... shit, TREES AND MUSKRATS are using this stuff to tidy up.
Alas, The Clorox Company (AKA, the company that still sells billions of gallons of a household cleaning fluid that can literally dissolve clothing) feels SO guilty about their flagship product, they had to redeem themselves. That's like the Colombian drug lord who gives to the nearby poor people for respect. Albeit, Colombian drug lords don't advertise how wonderful they are to the world.
Alas, The Clorox Company (AKA, the company that still sells billions of gallons of a household cleaning fluid that can literally dissolve clothing) feels SO guilty about their flagship product, they had to redeem themselves. That's like the Colombian drug lord who gives to the nearby poor people for respect. Albeit, Colombian drug lords don't advertise how wonderful they are to the world.
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