I see 2 different glove colors, 3 hands, 2 needles … but …

The Museum Of Marketing Madness
Curating, skewering and roasting the worst of advertising to comic perfection

Much to critique and demolish here … join me!

I get that the message here is WATERMELON RED fruity healthy upbeat happy. But that shampoo bottle looks a little too much like a yogurt drink, right?

And while they’re throwing COLORS did anyone stop to think what color represents “Yes” and which “No.” Red/Green = Stop/Go, right? Yes, no? Not really, sorta.
Rice Starch: “Yes AND Green!”
Silicones:”No AND Green!”
Plumping: “Yes AND Red!”
What is Plumping: “Yes!!
Columns to organize information: WTF?! No but YES!!!

And finally. how did Halloween colors and costumes get mixed up in here? And why is Drew Barrymore wearing a bumble bee costume? Is it Fall already?! Summer’s over???

The window display of the Loft store at one of the most prominent locations on planet earth, 42nd and Broadway, should make a strong impression.
But what is this? It looks … hmm … can’t really see much on display here.
Well now wait a second, there is SOMETHING.
Yes it’s a Windows Error in the Window.

The world may be in terrible shape.
Covid has altered the globe.
The Middle East is a mess.
Our system of democracy is teetering.
But the Oreo Aisle (formerly the “Cookies and Crackers Aisle”) is a Reason To Celebrate.

And what better way to celebrate than Lady Gaga Oreos?

In case you were wondering what a Lady Gaga Oreo tastes like, there’s some subtle indications on the package.

Why of course! It’s inspired by … uh … is that a clump of pubic hair? What the hell is that saying. OH SURE! Gaga’s latest album or concert or cause or song or video or dress or cookie … Chromatica.

And what does Chromatica spelled with pubic hair taste like? Pink colored golden green creme stuff cookie thing crap. Say it with me now:
I spotted these manikins a few years back and thought: “What the hell? Half-headed, white stylized human figures … something’s not right!” If only I could make a joke out of it.

But then I spotted these creatures …

Real Live, Old School, Childhood Nightmare Manikins and realized ….

“OHH!! The half-headed manikins are weird. But plain, old manikins are absolutely horrifying!”

The reason you can’t see below his shoulders is because this is a mug shot and he’s holding up his booking ID.
Between the statement “Color Makes You Happy” and the expression of unbridled joy on these manikins faces … the message is clear.

Fashion now, Fashion now!
This is just lazy, uh, copywriting. If you can call it copywriting. As Dada-ist poetry, it’s brilliant.
Sometimes its it’s very hard to articulate what exactly a consumer is seeking. When all else fails, why not: NEED WANT NOW


So wait, does this mean “Iron Means Iron?” Or does the first iron cancel out the second iron and that they are really saying is “MEANS?!” I think I just blew my own mind.
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